Writer Writer Write Write

I am Dr. Writer McLiterary and this is my famous essay. Please bown in front of my genuis, and yes we may use that as a noun. This is a phallic symbol and you wish your mother had bigger boobs. Adjectives are meant to dangle and dingle ends in "el." Puncuation fits neatly inside quotes which begin with commas and end with "he said." Indugle my metaphor and hyphenate my hyperbole. Both will end up brilliant by the time your eyes notice the footnote explaining my brilliance.

So, I'm not so into writing these days. I'm obviously doing less, and the thing's I'm doing I've done and written about before, but I don't even feel like putting my fingers on the keyboard. When I enter URLs, its with a single finger, filled in automatically on my seearch bar, or I just look through history. I bookmark everything and comb farther and farther back in blogs and archives. Every article published on the priests abusing deaf boys? Sure! The blog the lady who made Juno kept when she was a stripper? All pages, please. Every photo Kelly O has taken of drunk people? BRING ME THE RICHES. I've been following Charlie Sheen and have culled through every page of Sarah Silverman's twitter. I hate them both less.

So I'm learning, even if I don't take note of it, and if its mundane pop cultures stuff I'll only make references to. I will make me more obscure-sounding and erudite and less approachable. That's what I'm going for.

And as I'm reading, or talking to a friend (hidden neatly in Maryland's hardwood flooring), or driving home from my uncle's listening to Modest Mouse and bone-crushing volume, I'll get these flashes of verbalization, smart things, reaction, phrases that help me understand what's goin on. These are often innapropriatley timed and awkardly said. For example, I was at a potluck attended by very fancy people, McLean (actually, it was somewhere else, but I can't spell that place) families with art collections. My sister was an an excellent production of Rent taking place in their basement. My Hobo Best Friend's Dad who's been a father figure to me for years asked me why I'd gotten my nose pierced. Its hard for me to explain usually beyond "I like it." But here, with a plate of roasted autumnal vegetables and spanish tapas in my hand on a plastic plate, the words came:

"Well, in a lot of way, having this on my face has freed me from how people view me. Before, I was constatnly worried about not looking strong enough, tough enough, brave enough, bad ass enough. But getting the piercing helped me feel proud in a number of ways. Firstly, It makes me proud that I actually followed through on something that I wanted to do. It's not just a dream for the future, I actaully went through with it. Secondly, it lets me not worry so much about how I look. It's a symbol that I don't take my self too seriously, that I'm not afraid of imperfections that I aquire through my life. Also, It's freeeing. For example, before I got the piercing, I would never wear a cardigan like this. I would feel preppy and fake and not true to my inner strong self, even though I actually like the cardigan. But with the piercing, even as I see the cardigan and know that it's preppy, I don't need to worry about that being my only presentation to the world. It's bigger than that, and there are more symbols involved, more data to make a conculsion. I feel like I am presenting part of my self that I am proud of to the world: parts that aren't scared, that follow through, that are strong and face outwards. It's almost a definition of my sexuality...."

at this point, I realized Hobo's Dad had cocked his head upwards and raised his eyebrows. Those are facial symbols I know and love, the "what the helll is she talking about???" face. And the Armenian music prodegy and her diplomat husband were looking, and the Jewish lady with frizzy hair and her 7 foot husband. Important, but not appropriate.

And I'm saying these things because I'm not writing them. I'm not getting out my long sentances and alliterations and observations on gender roles in my damn computer where they belong and instead am burdening my friend's parents with my inner thoughts about my facial structure. Not so classy, sweetheart.

what I've been doing

I've been home now for time that no longer makes sense to count in hours. Got home Sunday night and now it's Wednseday afternoon, well into the "time to do things" era of the Post Study Abroad Experience. I haven't really done much, though, but I don't particularly feel bad about it. I saw one of my two neighbor-friends and I can't wait to see the other. I ate the beloved chinese food and really, it is that good. Really. I took a shower in water that heated up so fast I was sure someone was tricking me.

The main out-of-the-house expedition was a stretching class in Takoma Park. You may be saying "that is a load of hooey bullshit" unless you are one of my mother's hippie dippie friends in which case you are probably in the class with me. Hidden, in the back. Was it you that put the hot water in my shower? Anyway, the class is about actively stretching specific muscles (in fact, its called Active Isolated Stretching) so that they can strenthen and relax, both of which cause you less pain and stress. So I did that which required about an hour of driving. It's not so fun to drive after watching three major car accidents in Quito. I'm so worried a bicycle will enter the lane and I'll hit him and his neck will go all crooked or someone will cut me off and I'll kill there seven unseatbelted children in the backseat or a giant gasoline truck will rear-end me and my skin will sizzle off.

I called a lot of people, the lovely EMILY among them. It's strange to be able suddenly to communicate with the ease of the telephone after having to type up everything I wanted to say to a friend or have to struggle with skype. And of course we are way more connected than we ever have been, waaaaay more, you can read this from Estonia (who is my one reader from Estonia? I would love to meet you), write me about it on facebook, or just send me an emoticon. The internet has changed the world! Did you know this!

Ma and Lester go to work and school in the day. I read Chuck Klosterman and eat cheese. I watch four ERs in a row. I obsessively update my planner. I miss Pilar.

Enough boring, more smarts.

Things that astonish me

-bricks as buliding material

-its cold and the trees are dead

-its safe to be outside at night.

-People use ovens frequently

-There's such variety when it comes to packaged/processed foods. I haven't been to a grocery store yet, but I can see it just in the pantry or the cabinet. Low sodium chicken and rice soup, fat free chicken noodle. Baked beans, refried beans, cuban black beans, white beans, garbanzo beans, white beans. Crackers: water, spelt, grahm, stoned wheat, granola bar (and granola proper), pretzel.

home!?!

Ok guys so I'm home, sitting in my hyattsville basement, typing away. Home. Home where its cold, i have different clothes, constant hot water, a sister, a dog, a refrigerator with more than just cabbage and queso fresco in it. Home? Weird. I'm without a laptop charger so the few entries I wrote between then and now are safely inside my sleeping computer, but I'll summarize them here: I'm glad to be back. things are more unfamiliar than I thought they would be. United States politics are shameful. A woman should have the right to choose. It's cold here and all plants are dead. My family has a lot of cushions and food. Two of my suitcases have broken. I am unpacked an have moved into the "piles" phase.

I can't wait to see everybody and all that. And keep writing. And EAT CHINESE FOOD. There is Shezhuan (sorry actual geographic location, I cannot spell you) string beans, Ma Po (If you are a place, Ma Po, I also apologize) tofu, and lo main. I will use chopsticks and my cup will overflowith.

If you live round these parts, give me a call/comment/facebookmessage and we can hang out!

And don't worry, the blog don't quit just cuz I changed hemispheres